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The American Dream is a Fu*king Lie

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The American Dream is a Fu*king Lie

The American Dream as I know it is that the person with the most money & expensive possessions wins. Why else do we have 3+ car garages that are filled with stuff and our cars parked in the driveway because there is no room? In addition stores like Costco so we can have tons of everything in mass quantity. 

Once again I call bullshit on the fucking American Dream.

I lived the consumer driven American Dream. Was raised in a working class family where we had a nice life, but tons of struggles financially. My mom was an alcohol and drug addict. By the time I was 30 I had earned my 1st million dollars and at 35 was worth several million wearing 10+ carets of diamonds with a diamond studded Presidential Gold Rolex. I had live in help, my kid in the finest school in the state, only designer clothes while traveling at least monthly & only first class 4+ star hotels. Rags to riches baby and living the dream right?

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I was miserable and my body self destructing at every turn as my financial worth & possessions grew.

Once you have money and possessions the world becomes a much different place and I don't mean easier. Tons of folks simply worry about not having money and most struggle to have genuine relationships with others.

Money changes quite honestly everything and not having to worry is not one of the things.

It is funny how for me personally money changed my thinking. Made me less genuine and much more materialistic. It got to the point where our household monthly financial burn was over $25,000. If we wanted it we bought it. If we thought it we did it. Literally for most of my adult life I was living the dream.

The larger my ability to be a consumer grew the sicker my body got.

I thought achieving the American Dream would be the ticket to happiness. Instead it was the ticket to paranoia, superficial relationships and having way too much stuff. I was buried under possessions I hardly used. Shit, I had a craft room which only at Christmas time did I ever step foot in this room. Yet it was outfitted with everything you neededd to make any type of craft any day of the week and yet I used it with my daughter for the Christmas holiday only.

What the fuck.

Many American families have more cars than drivers in a household. I was one of them. We had a 4 wheel drive, sports car, family car and date night car. We were not alone in our neighborhood everyone had the same. Every house needs more cars than drivers in 2018 it seems. I see this all over America as I tour so it must be true.

What the fuck.

When I grew up we had 2 cars with 5 drivers and one was a company car that only my Daddy could drive. So literally we had one car for 4 drivers and somehow it worked just fine.

What happens with the consumer driven American Dream is that it only benefits the companies whose stuff we buy. It does nothing to help us be happy, healthy and secure and in fact it does the complete opposite.

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You see when you have tons of stuff it keeps you in the cycle of having to work hard always to pay for this stuff.

I remember when I was running big tech companies I would encourage staff to buy expensive cars with their bonus checks because I knew if they accumulated debt they would continue to work hard to pay for their expensive possessions. This was taught to me by the CEO and President of a company I worked for and encouraged by the board of directors at our yearly planning meetings. They would tell me to keep encouraging the sales staff to spend on big ticket items so they work hard to hit their bonuses each year. Bonuses they now need to live their expensive lives filled with possessions.

Not going to lie I often feel sad about this part of my life and my actions.

The real truth is that this is what America is built upon - 100% consumerism. Simply look at credit card company growth and their marketing tactics. Somehow these companies have us believing that using a credit card is the way to "free" airline tickets and we all buy into this fucking lie which is the greatest marketing scam there is. Put money on a credit card to get points for a FREE airline ticket. There is nothing FREE about these tickets and yet we ALL buy into this fucked up marketing scam saying "I got my ticket free with miles."

Once again I call bullshit.

Today I live in a van with minimal possessions at the American standard of poverty. I am also potentially the most healed from Multiple Sclerosis using ONLY diet and lifestyle in the world. I am living an American Dream. The one that no one talks about. It is actually a life dreams are made of.

A life lead by purpose, fueled by community & nourished by Mother Nature.

Today I live my life with hardly any stress. I am a minimalist who has more than enough. I see nature as a place I need to be daily. I move my body freely and without pain by offering it daily meditation, mindfulness, conscious movement and have applied the art of bio-hacking to my foods and most of my life. I serve others and have true friends all over the world. None of this involves consumer driven anything. Zero. Nada.

This was not possible when I was living a consumer possession driven life because that life keeps score. When you live a life of purpose there is no score keeping because you are driven by ideal's and not stuff.

The person with the most stuff actually does not win. Sad to be the party pooper.

Winning is living your dream and if your dream happens to net you financial freedom it is what you do with this freedom that defines you. Do you buy more shit or do you use it to drive an outcome that fuels goodness and not a 3 car garage filled with shit from Costco so you have to park in the driveway.

  • Possessions do not deliver joy.

  • Possessions do not deliver health.

  • Possessions do not deliver purpose.

  • Possessions do not deliver true friends.

  • Possessions do not deliver best life living.

For those suffering from anything, physical or mental issues please know that the consumer driven American Dream stands in the way of your healing. It does nothing to help you tap your BAM. I know because I lived it.

Defining YOU and YOUR best self does and this has nothing to do with consumerism.

I wake up with joy in my heart and excitement for every day. Do you?

Not subscribed to my award winning blog yet? Today is a good day.

Join the tribe.

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Living a Passion Driven Life

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Living a Passion Driven Life

I cannot believe that in 10 days the "Taking it to the Streets" Tour sponsored by Nutiva and Natural Habitats officially begins. Seems like yesterday I decided to make this all happen & now it is here & so very real.

Not going to lie until I am actually out there figuring it out I live in disbelief this is all really happening.  Sounds ridiculous I know, but the thought that this girl will be driving all over the USA seems unbelievable & yet is the basis of every action I take each day.

Yes I am still getting used to my miracle status.

As I put together spreadsheet after spreadsheet mapping out this journey I am overwhelmed with gratitude to serve my brothers and sisters. Little did I know when I decided to live a 100% passion driven life that I would be where I am today.

Almost every day someone asks me, "Is your body going to be able to do this V?"

Every time I stop & think silently for a brief second, "You crazy asshole this is never going to work." until I remember my history since living a passion driven life has proven otherwise.

Actually my passion driven life defies all cultural norms & continues to deliver miraculous outcomes so why the fuck can't I do this is the immediate next statement that comes right behind the negative talk.

What is a "Passion Driven Life" really many ask me?

In our global consumer driven world it is almost impossible not to fall into the autopilot of life living day after day with little thought or focus on our individual passion. Most are driven by bills, responsibility & cultural norms which have nothing to do with a passion driven life & everything to do with routine.

Trust me I was so very guilty of this for most of my life. Driven by stuff aka greed and defined by possessions with higher purpose being guided by these shallow ideal's. No wonder my body blew up with Multiple Sclerosis taking control.

Today I have zero. Merely 30 personal possessions, a leased car, dog, laptop & 20 aprons to use for cooking classes.

My life driven by moral obligation.

Reason does not come into play beyond safety & 100% pure self-love. This my friends is a passion driven life.

  • "Sure "V" sounds great, but I got shit to pay!"
  • "Tell my partner that V!"
  • "4 kids, aging parents and a mortgage say dream on."

I have heard it all. I lived each one out for years.

Until I had my entire body blow the fuck up punching me in the face day after day doing whatever it wanted while I was just taking each blow trying to act like a champ, but I am a BOSS.
  • A BOSS owns their life.
  • A BOSS is conscious & does not follow cultural norms.
  • A BOSS knows who they are.

I didn't. Somewhere along the way this BOSS lost herself. Forgetting who she was.

We all have had dreams. We all have believed if even for a moment we could do or be something that dreams are made of. I ask you to search inside yourself to find that place again. We all got that shit we just forgot about it or maybe put it on pause for a stay.

When you are ready to turn the passion switch "on" you need to tap that place again.

Search for it & once you get there ask and answer the questions:

  • If I got it all right in 1 year what would my life look like?
  • &
  • start mapping that shit out with the passion you just tapped.

For more on how to raise the roof on life you best be subscribed to my newsletter.

It comes out weekly with a blog & two more topics of interest that can inspire your miracle life so of course you will love it.

"Oh it Gets Wild" Newsletter rules is all I am saying so join the tribe. BAM.

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Top 5 Helpful Tips to Detox Your Life

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Top 5 Helpful Tips to Detox Your Life

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By: V Capaldi You had to see it coming!  The last 3 weeks the blog is all about detoxing. I will eventually get over it, but for right now I really hope you will stick with me on this topic of detox.

How the "F"  do you detox your life? 

For many of us a starting point is beyond comprehension and for others we believe we have no need for a life detox. No matter where you see yourself in this spectrum I can almost guarantee the list below will speak to all of us. One thing I have learned both personally and professionally is that many of us share the same internal dialogue that can lead to negative outcomes in life. Often all are a result of cultural norms and/or societal pressures that occur in our subconscious.

There is no question the following list will serve as a perfect reminder for all of us to live our best life toxic free. The greatest part is they have all been tested by the miracle known as PaleoBOSS Lady®.  #damnit

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Top 5 Tips To Detox Your Life:

  1. Check Yourself:  Shit is not always about you.  When we find ourselves feeling insulted or offended when someone does not call us back or respond to a text right away, when we did not get the invite to something we thought we should and blah blah blah...we need to put our shit in check because that thinking means your current life lens thinks the entire world only revolves around you.  Hello! Life is not always focused on our needs when others make their choices. We have no idea where someone may be emotionally or what their needs may or may not be with each interaction.  We are all only responsible for ourselves and what we need and everyone gets to decide for themselves no matter what.  Trust me. Stop it.
  2. Give & Take:  One sided shit sucks. If you are acting that way stop it now. If someone in your life is create change to stop it now. The 'give a shit' ratio needs to be present on both sides. Not necessarily equal, but present for a truly non-toxic relationship. Many of us have a handful in our circle that do not meet this criteria and we question it. Next time you question it, cut it off. A toxic bye bye. The end.
  3. Know Your Motivation:  Stop the bullshit of "All I have done for them and they do nothing back." If you are doing shit because you want something in return than you are toxic. Do stuff because you want to. Come from a place of genuine desire and the returns come as a result of that energy.  The type of energy you put into the universe is what comes back. Many call it Karma. Engaging in conversation about our own internal motivations when you do things for others will stop this toxic thinking.  Be honest or you are wasting your time. Damn it.
  4. #1 Status:  You have to have #1 status in YOUR life. What a freaking concept to put yourself 1st. This idea was so hard for me to overcome and many battles fought in the therapy chair over this I can promise you. Yet once I finally got out of my own damn way the miracle of my life really started to unfold before my eyes. I became a better everything as a result and believe this is a huge 1st step. Remember we only have to answer to ourselvesand what our body, mind and spirit need to thrive in a morally conscious way.  F everyone else. Jump on this shit.Now.
  5. Gratitude:  Putting time aside each day to see life through a place of gratitude is key. This allows for so many toxins to leave life. I am personally blessed because since childhood for the most part I wake up happy every day. However in my adult life this is not always the case and often has required concontrated effort.   Today when I struggle to find a sense of gratitude I take it back to the breath with personal & invigorating often exaggerated breathing mantra's that support my detox life:

Suggested Mantra's of Gratitude:

With each breath in say the 1st word and on a forced exhale say the 2nd all in your minds eye;

Breathing in love and out hate...

  • Love/Hate
  • Nurture/Toxins
  • Comfort/Fear
  • Sun/Clouds
  • Nature/Chemicals
  • Joy/Sadness

*I may or may not have fun getting really loud & exaggerated on the exhale. Similar to how I did when I was in kindergarten and we sang songs. I would scream with joy. The end. #ohitgetswild

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Now that you see the list one can quickly notice all of us might fall prey to this toxic list. #doubledamnit

It is almost impossible to incorporate any of these without a conscious effort. As someone who is very self motivated I can tell you that although each step is now automatic it starting by putting 3 minutes aside to do mantra's and growing from there. Even from the start this exercise can produce HUGE results, but you have to do it.

Once again the moral of the story is if you own your life great shit happens such as living a miracle life. This gal is living proof and the above are my TOP 5 Tips.

How about we all share my blog with every single person you have ever met?

Okay if that is too radical you can make sure to subscribe and not miss another weekly episode of nonsense, maybe post it somewhere as a nice gesture of love, support and BAMness at the same time.

Together I am hoping to raise the roof on life and living by questioning the status quo. Time to say "Bye bye Autopilot life & hello BAM!"

Hello miracles. #BAM

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How To Meditate in 5 Easy Steps

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How To Meditate in 5 Easy Steps

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By: PaleoBOSS Lady® The first time I made a conscious effort to start meditating was 1996. I just suffered a severe Multiple Sclerosis attack and was desperate to find calm within the storm. I bought tapes, books and magazines and devoured as much information as I can find.

At the time I was living in Delaware and access to holistic intentions like this were often difficult to access community. So off I went to the Golden Door in Escondido, California. During my time at the Golden Door active daily participation in medication classes happened coupled with much internal 'work'.  The beauty of this was each day students were offered various forms of meditation.  By the end of my week stay I had several variations in my "Bag of Tricks!"

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The key to success for me was to continue the practice and identifying how to best accomplish this.  It's funny because only recently has my mindset regarding meditation changed.  A conscious effort to meditate is not a meditation practice.

A practice of meditation comes without effort and is commonplace in your life.

Today, PaleoBOSS Lady® meditates using several variations all based on the day, the moment and the intention. The greatest thing about meditation is learning and accepting the myth of sitting down in a cross-legged position and chanting is bull shit.

Meditation can be done however you define and that is the most empowering message of all!

How to Meditate in 5 Easy Steps:

1. Spend time figuring out how to be most comfortable enabling you to eventually achieve the goal of quieting your mind. Quite honestly this can be any way you want! Sitting, standing, lying, legs up, legs down, cross-legged even walking is acceptable regarding meditation.

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For me personally this position evolves and changes. Living in constant conversation with your body allows for this with ease. You may identify several positions that work for you based on these conversations. The key is to listen for the answer.

2. Find the space that works for manifesting a quiet mind during a practice. Consider the space sacred for at least the time the meditation is happening. Your sacred space can be different and evolving just as you practice is.  However, setting an intention within the space is a critical element that remains regardless.

I often find once I locate the space certain elements within the space are essential to the mindset to have the space feel sacred. Lightening candles, diffusing essential oils,  listening to music or sounds playing in the background  & even being out doors works.  Many times I find myself yearning for the sound of air & the feel of sun, wind or rain on me as the sacred space.

Incorporating elements to enrich the experience should also be part of the conversation when creating your sacred space.  Be comfortable asking yourself what makes your space comforting to you!  No body, but you and for that moment!

3. Download an app with a meditation timer! I love this and it makes it easy because many of them offer wonderful meditative sound effects to start and end your practice. I personally use Insight Timer and love how it shares how many other people worldwide are meditating with you! The power community once again speaks with this little feature in the app!

In lieu of downloading an app, I recommend getting a timer and/or a bell to be used to start and stop your practice. Little gongs and triangles are often used once again personal preference is essential.

4. Start slow without expectation beyond commitment! I recommend starting with a five-minute commitment for at least three days a week. It is recommended that you not be fully awake when engaging in your practice. Typically I've consumed about half a cup coffee before meditating. Define what this means for you and for many the state of mind needed to accomplish a successful practice happens before going to bed. No rules here just breath and quiet your thoughts.  If your mind is busy no pressure.  Just remind it that it is quiet time!

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Gradually and at a sustained pace increase your time. There are no rules beyond honest conversation that continues on a path of self growth that often feels uncomfortable coupled with real commitment to quiet the mind!

This should be a lifestyle change and not a short-term resolution. Therefore there is no race to the finish and often slow and steady is the best way to roll.

5. Change your mindset or fake it till you make it regarding meditation. A conscious life requires balance and with balance comes daily large doses of self-care. To include dedicated time to a meditation practice should never be an issue when you are living a conscious life.

I know you're all thinking sounds great in theory, but there's this thing called life!

I honestly have to tell you that the first step of a conscious life is realizing what's important for you to manifest your life. Some of you may not believe meditation is important or needed. I am not going to argue this point.

The only way to find out is to allow for 30 to 60 days of some form of commitment to a practice and see. Science, personal experience and history have shown that meditation increases quality of life for those practicing. What you have to lose?

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If anything I said offended you than you MUST subscribe to my blog! Kidding.

I hope something engaged you however that manifested.  Offensive is not what I am going for, but I will take it because it means you were engaged.

Consider subscribing to this great blog by this gal who considers herself a walking miracle!  Overcoming secondary progressive MS is not easy and it is the community of YOU that encourages my journey.

Long story short…is just subscribe and lets manifest life together!  Kicking ass the whole time!

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